Clearing the drafts in my inbox, I came across this post I had written way back in September 2006 (20th September 2006 to be exact), and somehow never posted it. Well, as it happens, this year's Osian's Film Festival 2012- Indian, Asian and Arab Cinema, is currently ongoing (info is linked above for the movie buffs). Hence, almost befitting that this long lost post is finally online after six years when this year's festival is ongoing, same as that one day in September 2006. Presenting - The Buyer:
Let me start at the beginning: Twas a happy go lucky start to the day.
Or maybe not so much. After going to sleep at the usual God-ly hour of
5.30am, I had to be up at 8.00 in order to meet a prospective buyer
for one of my VCDs. Oh yes, I am on my way to being a successful
businessperson. Sent an email to a listserve with a list of my VCDs I
no longer wanted to and lo and behold I got a response from a member.
The deal was to meet her at 8.45am with the movie. Since the venue was
not too far from home I agreed to the previously mentioned Godly hour
and having gotten up at 8.00am sharp, drove bleary-eyed to the
rendezvous. 'I will be in this and this car and will be wearing this'
always has an exciting feel to it, especially for movie buffs like me.
Well, have you ever done this, - that you have to meet someone at some
place and then when you get there and see them, you pretend like you
haven't and then wait till they see you first while you act cooler
than a prickly heat powder. I do it all the time, barely works, but I
don't give up easily so I keep doing it. After about two minutes of
playing the powder the prospective buyer approached. Me: Hi, how are
you. I'm here with the movie. I didn't have any difficulty finding
this place. Have you been waiting long. I'm here with the movie
(silently wispring to myself: way too much talking happening, shut up
shut up, act cool). Buyer: Ya. Did you say you had difficulty finding
this place or did you say you did not have difficulty in finding this
place? Me: Uh....(silence) I'm here with the movie. Buyer: Hmm. Me:
(this isn't going too well) Buyer: I haven't heard of this adaptation,
but I guess I might as well buy it otherwise you would have come for
nothing. Me: Oh no its okay, you don't have to buy it. (WHAT! Shut up)
Take your time to decide and I can always come again. I did not have a
problem finding this place! I have a car, I can come again whenever
its convenient for you (Groan, you moron) Buyer: Okay then, let me
think about it. Me: Okay, call me when you have decided. Bye. Me in
the car: Well that was just bloody great! Why did you call me here
with my CD at this time of the morning if you did not want to buy it.
You had all the details on email. Damn. And you, you idiot, what
happened to the resolution to act cool and all businessy. Sad start to
my business ambitions. Well, haven't heard from her so far and if I
do, I have given myself a pep talk to act very businesspersonny and
not like a sissy geek.
Let me fast forward to the second transaction, ostensibly to be
carried out this evening. A very friendly voice called and said 'Uh I
emaile you about the mooovie. Can I get eet.' Me: great, I can meet
you somewhere convenient and give it to you (shut up before you agree
to drive 20km to make a 100buck sale). Fortunately the buyer in
question was coming to the Osian Film Fest and that being 'not too
far' from home, I agreed to meet her there just before 9 and make the
deal. With the usual 'i will be in this car' and 'I will be in a Green
dress' talk, was up and ready when the call came at 8.40 and drove to
the rendevous point, spotted the buyer and made the deal. I even took
the initiative of taking the requisite change with me, and She turned
out to be very friendly and we promptly finished the transaction. The
deal got complicated as I got home and was geting out of the car I
noticed that the lady in question had left a mobile in the car. Groan,
no..........so I got back right in and drove back towards Siri Fort.
Well this is just great, - Typical. By the time I got to the Siri Fort
turning the traffic there was horrendous and after managing to make
the turn I started looking around for 'the buyer' in the hope that she
had realised the mobile was in my car and maybe was hanging around in
the hope that I find it and drive back to the Fort. Well no such luck,
so after getting yelled at by the traffic cop, by a really angry
looking young lady who practically bellowed at me, being stared at by
a bunch of drivers (probably thinking, isn't this the same car which
had had gotten stuck while making a u-turn just 10min ago. Hey look,
its the same car and the same girl. Ha ha' I decided to turn back.
Only, it was too late and there was no turning back (as they say). The
road behind me was chock-a-block with traffic so the movement possible
was in the forward direction. So I drive for another 15minutes, get
stuck among the parked cars for another 10 and after about 40minutes
of this ordeal, get back home, to discover that the cook had waited
and gone back home and I had another night of maggi ahead of me.
Bloody great. So this is the story of transaction number two. It
doesn't stop here though, the mobile (you know which one) had been
ringing every 20minutes and I dare not turn it off. Thankfully the
buyer called a few minutes ago at midnight, 'My mobile is at your car,
can I get eeet' Me: Oh yeah, I went back looking for you but didn't
find you there. I can meet you somewhere mid-way or drive to your
place to give you the mobile (oh puhleeese shut up woman, anyone else
would have asked her to come get it, and what about that resolution to
act cool and all adult and businessy) The buyer: No eets ok, its my
mobile so I come. So yes dear reader, I am going to be up and early
tomorrow morning after my two hours of sleep, to wait for 'The Buyer'.